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10 possible reasons

October 2, 2019, 12:21 pm

Here are ten possible reasons that Dar wakes up most mornings screaming like someone is drilling 17 of his teeth: His caterwaulings are his way of saying “cock-a-doodle-doo,” and Dar is half-rooster, which might explain other things. He doesn’t like his bed because it doesn’t hold him enough. We moved him from a standard child bed to one that holds him more, but maybe we need the full Temple Grandin? He’s trapped in this mute body but he’s really neuro-typical.
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Greta the Great

September 26, 2019, 10:38 am

Perhaps you’ve heard of Greta Thunberg. I was a little surprised to hear that her most popular tweet of the last thirty days went like this: “When haters go after your looks and differences, it means they have nowhere left to go. And then you know you’re winning! I have Aspergers and that means I’m sometimes a bit different from the norm. And – given the right circumstances- being different is a superpower. #aspiepower” That tweet earned 772,000+ likes! That’s more
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Timeate Change

September 19, 2019, 4:41 pm

Dar is Dar. I spent this week fighting for his future in a different way…arranging to plant trees and arranging to attend the climate strike tomorrow. I’ll try to return to something more like the blog next week. Thanks for checking this space! Share this post

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The bad kind of SIBs

September 12, 2019, 7:36 am

Dar’s latest bruise is on my brain. If you’re not a parent, or if your kid(s) is/are neuro-typical, you may not be familiar with the term “self-injurious behavior,” a term common enough in my community to be regularly acronym-ized. We’ll see forms that say “SIBs?” or “Amount of SIBs ____” or the like. The SIB I saw this week left me scared…for Dar and for us. I don’t know exactly what prompted it. No doubt our ABA therapist (who Dar
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One letter off

September 6, 2019, 10:49 am

Have you ever noticed that Big Sur is almost Big Surf? And even though that seems appropriate – Big Sur has big surf – etymologically, they’re not related? Also, Carmel is one letter away from caramel and camel. Carmel has good caramels but not good camels. Darwin is one letter away from some neuro-typical kid named Darin or Darwina. When I was his current age, I would sit around thinking about things like this. He can’t. Or at least, all evidence
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On “How did that happen?”

August 30, 2019, 11:24 am

Now that I’m pushing 50, many of my friends are doing likewise. That means that many of them are parents of kids that are teenagers and/or pre-teens. That means that in the last few weeks, I’ve seen a lot of first-day-of-school photos of kids, often annotated by, or commented upon, with the words (or words to the effect of) “How did that happen?” Real talk: ohhhh, do I ever envy that implied lack of intentionality. Let me back this up a scootch.
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It’s Fun To Play At The…

August 22, 2019, 4:12 pm

Gather round, kids! Story time. Dar and his brother and I have been going to the designated Family Swim hour at the Downtown Berkeley YMCA. I love that they’re at this age where they can stand on the bottom of the Shallow Pool but they’re also not so big that they’re intimidating…or so I thought. I’ve been teaching R to swim, and he’s getting good. He can reliably make it almost one lap. I don’t love that he insists on
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“I’m trash!”

August 15, 2019, 11:34 am

Watching Dar on the shoreline the other day got me thinking about Toy Story 4. Spoilers below, so come back after you’ve seen the movie. For years, in my film classes, whenever Toy Story has arisen as a topic, I’ve mentioned how it’s basically a Biblical allegory in which Andy is God and Woody is a believer trying to convert the heretical Buzz. There’s a lot more to it than that (Andy’s room as Paradise, the other toys as disciples, etc),
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Dar at Channel Islands 2019

August 9, 2019, 3:29 pm

Thanks for enjoying the post about Dar hiking Angel Island! I may have forgotten to mention that one reason we visited Angel Island was to prepare for a then-upcoming trip to the Channel Islands. My wife has wanted to go to the Channel Islands for years. Having been there, I was like, why? Well, it’s California’s only national park that she hadn’tvisited. I said, “but…we have Angel Island.” But…we went to the Channel Islands anyway. The boat trip from the
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Angel Island 2019

August 1, 2019, 5:53 am

A year ago I never would have even considered trying to walk with Dar from sea level to anything called “Mount.” But we’re getting more audacious ever since our recent successful walks in Zion and Bryce Canyon. Despite now having to carry emergency seizure medicine wherever we go. Granted, the Mount in question is the smallest Mount I’ve ever heard of, at 788 feet. And…even that was a tremendous challenge. The “sea level” was a big part of the problem.
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