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Trying to be more like my heroes

July 17, 2019, 10:58 am

My heroes walk among us. They resemble you and me. They do not wear capes. One might say their identities remain secret. They do not have hundreds of thousands of Instagram followers. They rarely call attention to themselves. They are discreet and careful, and I believe most passersby do not pay them much notice. I see them sometimes, moving through the world. They rarely appear to notice me. I usually behave as though I do not see them, trying to
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How was Dar’s vacation?

July 3, 2019, 1:48 am

The last two weeks, I showed you the photos. But how was Dar’s vacation? Uhhh…not bad? Flying vs. driving presents trade-offs for us. Flying is efficient but expensive, considering we’ll still have to rent a car wherever we go. Also, Dar has been known to melt down on planes, which can turn into a nightmare. We tend to drive. Despite the added transport time, Dar mostly likes road trips. I believe he likes watching the scenery go by. But there are
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Dar from AZ (Arizona)

June 26, 2019, 11:20 am

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Dar from B to Z

June 20, 2019, 6:25 am

That is, Dar from Berkeley to Zion. Just photos here. Also includes stops at Bravo Farms, Paris in Las Vegas, and Bryce Canyon. Enjoy! (P.S. I have no idea why wordpress converts some photos to side-view when viewed on laptop – and keeps these same photos normal when viewed on a phone. It’s a five year mystery! Have I checked settings? YES.)   This kid was so nice…unprompted, she spent an hour playing in the pool with Dar. Sweet kid.
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With a C and a T and That Rhymes With P and That Stands For PCT

June 13, 2019, 12:54 pm

They say life “goes by in a flash.” But I don’t really think “they” are parents of autistic children. Imagine tapping into your inner Cheryl Strayed and hiking the entire Pacific Crest Trail. I mean, at some point in this decade, you’ve thought about it, right? Now imagine the day you finish after however many weeks (or months). You started in Canada, you walked 2,653 miles, now you arrive in Mexico (or vice-versa). Your mom meets you in Canada or
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Seizures, The Day

June 5, 2019, 4:57 pm

I haven’t been crowing about it here, but over the last six weeks or so, Dar began to sleep better. Dar chose a new room to sleep in and we chose a new sleep drug for him. I actually slept for seven straight hours for three nights in a row. Twice! I didn’t mention it here for fear of jinxing it. Well, it turns out I didn’t need to worry; we got jinxed anyway. At about 5am on Sunday morning,
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New diagnosis

May 29, 2019, 3:36 pm

Dar has a new one. From doctors. It’s actually kind of a big deal. I’m kinda writing a big entry about it. Which will wait until next week. Thanks, loyal readers, and see you then. Share this post

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“What’s the Opposite of Opposite?”

May 23, 2019, 8:41 am

“What’s the opposite of opposite?” my just-turned-seven-year-old asked me last week. When a kid that age asks their parent a question, and that parent doesn’t answer, but instead beams with pride, what does the kid think? “My parent is crazy?” “When will I learn the answer?” Or…”maybe I just did something very cool?” More than do something cool, I feel like Dar’s brother just invented a way of understanding his brother. And I love that, because long after Dar’s mom
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They Can Transfer Your Kid For Screaming Too Loudly

May 16, 2019, 9:04 am

This post is here to help parents of kids with autism. If you don’t need the help, feel free to move on to the next page. Like just about anyone with a severely autistic child, I habitually read a lot of information online about autism. When we sought to transfer our child from a “mainstream” school to a more specialized one, I read many, many horror stories. They’ll tell you that you need an advocate. They’ll tell you to record
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Dar’s First 2 Weeks at His New School

May 9, 2019, 8:19 pm

Everyone is asking me: “how is Dar’s new school?” Answer: It’s kinda great! I think it’s really early to make any big judgments. Nonetheless, we have an IEP in a few weeks as a sort of a check-in. What will we be talking about? If this was your nine-year-old, we’d ask him what he thinks of the place. Since this is Dar and he can’t tell us, we have to go by other metrics. One of those is my experiences
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